من الآخر (اسم برنامجي الجديد)

طيب.

It's not getting any better.

لأ بجد.

It is NOT getting any better.

هو إيه؟

أيّ حاجة.

كل حاجة.

بس ثواني، مش كده أحسن؟

كده كده، لو it got better، هتبقى عايز ال better-er ومش هَنِخْلَص.

طاب خُد عندك:

it gets worse.

خلّي الاعتبار ده في دماغك يعني.

عِش على الفكرتين دول وهتكون أسعد الناس، فبالتالي هتلاقي إن it got better، بس أول ما هتفكّر كده، أول ما هتحسّ إن إيه ده it gets better، هتاخد على دماغك.

الموضوع صعب أنا عارفة وفيه نوع من الparadox كده، بس فكّر فيها وهتلاقي إنّي بقول كلام متناقض بس كويس إلى حدٍ ما.

والسلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته. 

Oopsies, gotta go.

I always feel like someone, or something, is running after me.

Chasing me.

I'm sitting there, with nothing on my schedule, and I'm like: "I'm late. I'm super late."

What am I late for, I wonder?

I have to do something, I have to do a lot of stuff... I have to do anything other than what I'm doing right now.

Why?

Dissatisfaction? Anxiety?

I don't know, but I don't like it anyway.

I HAVE TO ACHIEVE SOMETHING.

I have to?

Do I want to?

What is it that I want to achieve?

It doesn't matter? Anything will do?

Isn't this the summer holiday?

Aren't I supposed to be relaxing?

"Hohoho, relaxing? What an idiot."

I'm constantly worried, for absolutely no reason, and I'm tired of it.